The Basics of Understanding Your Child

In most cases, parents become hard and strict with their children. They scold and reprimand them for their behavior and in the end become sorry for doing so. Responsible parenthood entails understanding your child. Here are some tips on how you can succeed in this aspect of parenthood.

Get To Know Your Children

When you have the time, individually talk to each of your children. Tell them about traits that are unique to them. By doing so, a special bond with your child is established.  This way, you will be able to understand them better. 

Having the time to communicate with your child is crucial to becoming a responsible and successful parent. At the same time, it will help you in guiding your child as they mature. 

It is worthwhile. The payoff is the intimate knowledge of whom your child is, which lays the foundation for the guidance you offer them.

Treat Your Child According To Their Nature

Since your child is unique from each other, you need to treat them separately. What is applicable to one may not be the same with the other. The philosophy one-size-fits-all is not exactly applicable in this case. Doing so will create some problems with your relationship with your children.

You need to tailor your actions and treatment according to the nature of each child. It is important to train your child according their nature so they would not forget it even if they become old, which is what the Proverbs say.

Criticize Their Traits, Not Behavior

When reprimanding, criticize your child for the personality trait that led to the inappropriate behavior and not for their action. As the saying goes, you need to trim the root and not the fruit. Ignoring the trait that causes the bad choice can lead to similar results in the future.

Do not rebuke your child but concentrate on the trait that led them to do such action. The action may not be bad but it is what caused such behavior. The resulting behavior may have been the right one based on the bad trait so the latter is what you need to correct.

As a parent, you need to determine the real cause of the problem by rooting out the bad trait that led to the wrong action. This is only possible when you have an understanding of your child.

Praise Your Child for Their Action

On the other hand, the handling of a good personality trait should be positive. However, do not relate them to their action as this could pressure them to establish their goodness by constantly doing well. In the process, they could wear themselves down.

Bear in mind that your child has endowment of innate personalities. They will remain in your child so you need to harness them appropriately. Every one of us has our own tendencies, whether innate or developed through experience. We are not responsible for them but our liability is with our actions.

Teach Your Child To Harness Their Character

When it comes to personality traits, there are always two sides to it: positive and negative. Not getting angry is a positive character but it can also turn out to be a negative trait.

As a parent, you are responsible for teaching your child learn about their primary character traits as well as the strengths and challenges that they offer. Helping them understand their own personality traits can last a lifetime.

By following these tips, you will be able to master the skill of understanding your child and in the process ensure a harmonious relationship with your child.

RECOMMENDED LINKS:

Understanding Your Child's Temperament 

Temperament Talk: A Guide to Understanding Your Child 

Understanding Your Child's Temperament: A Revolutionary Approach to Parenting 

The Mislabeled Child: How Understanding Your Child's Unique Learning Style Can Open the Door to Success 

How to Understanding Your Child.

Understanding your child is one of the most important things that you should learn as a parent. It is very helpful in becoming effective in guiding and nurturing your child as they grow and mature. You need to bear in mind that your child has a unique personality trait that remains consistent throughout life. 

One of the ways you can understand your child is by observing them as they sleep, eat, or play. Look for the consistent traits. Which activities do they like best? Is adjusting to changes easy for them or do they need time to become familiar with these things? These things are the normal characteristics of a child and your child may not be an exception. 

As much as possible, have time to talk to your children, as this is crucial to gaining information and understanding. In the case of young children, they require less verbal language and more facial expression and body language in order to understand their thoughts and feelings. Asking them questions will allow them to share their feelings to you. 
 

For example, rather than asking them what they did in school; ask them what they built with their blocks today. Instead, of asking them if they played with their playmate, focus on the game they played.

Another way of understanding your child is by looking at their environment in order to learn about a certain behavior that you have observed. Relatives, childcare providers, friends, teachers, the community, the home setting, and other aspects of the environment can play a crucial role in the behavior of your child. For example, if your child is showing aggressiveness towards other children at school, you may want to find out all the possible sources of their aggressive behavior.

Some possible angles would be their association with another child who is showing aggressive tendencies as well. The environment at home is another possible source for such behavior. Have there been conflicts and arguments at home lately that your child there watching? These are some angles, which you should consider when trying to find the reason behind your child's aggressive behavior.

In addition, you can learn about your child by observing other children belonging to the similar age group. You can check out books, browse the Internet, and attend a class about child development. Bear in mind that you went through the same stages as a child so more or less the behavior of children in that same stage would be similar. However, the speed of development through each stage is a personal thing.

By understanding your child's development, you will be able to provide them with opportunities as well as toys that can boost their development and prepare them for the next phase of their growth. At the same time, you as a parent would be able to set expectations and limits that are acceptable to your child.

Being a responsible parent is hard especially currently when parents spend more time working rather than being with their kids. Quality time is difficult to achieve when you are trying to juggle your time between corporate life and parenthood. Not many people achieve success in parenthood and this could be frustrating on your part. Understanding your child is one effective way of becoming successful in the art of parenting.

RECOMMENDED LINKS:

How to be a better parent;: Understanding yourself and your child 

Loving Parent`s Guide to Discipline- How to Teach Your Child to Behave-With Kindness, Understanding & Respect 

How to Help Your Child Say No to Sexual Pressure (Understanding Why Young People Engage in Sexual Actiivty At an Early Age)

Knowledgeable Parents Create Successful Children - Vol. 1 How to Create a Desire to Learn in Your Child (Parent Lectures Combining Shinichi Suzuki's and Jeanne Luedke's Teaching Philosophy) 

Four Outstanding Guides to Every Aspect of Childrearing for today's parents Featuring Baby and Child Care (Baby and Child Care (8th Ed.), How to Raise a Brighter Child, Toilet Training in Less Than a Day, Understanding Your Child from Birth to Three, Boxed Set)  

How to Save Your Collapsing Marriage.

Some little conflicts usually arise few years after marriage between the couples and this makes marriage life become stressful and boring. How will one know that his or her marriage is in a crisis? So many reasons are responsible for disturbed marriage such as financial difficulty, alcohol abuse, feeding difficulty, difficulty with children, unfaithfulness by both the partners, fertility problem and major life changes.

Conflicts in marriage may be caused by any of these: broken trust, infidelity, boredom, lack of respect, lack of affection, poor communication, hurtful statements, lack of appreciation, emotional abuse, selfishness, absence of sex, addictive behaviour and in-laws interference. When there is crisis in marriage, the two partner should try finding solutions on how to save their marriage.

The moment you realize that there is no peace in your marriage, don't hesitate in finding solutions to solve the lingering problem. Try to locate the cause of the problems, then find ways to adopt in order to save your collapsing marriage from collapsing which might lead to divorce and regrets. There are always hopeful ways to resolve marriage conflicts. Conflicts in marriage may be caused by ego or misunderstanding.

Hence, to maintain happy and healthy relationship, you should do away with ego and take an initiative of ending the lingering problems in your marriage life. Assessing yourself is an important approach to save your collapsing marriage. Always think of your mistakes and find ways to change and improve your behaviour. Avoid doing or saying those things that always hurts your partner.

There are approaches that are of great benefit of in saving a collapsing marriage. If you actually want to become a better partner, you should give listening ears to your partner and try to understand him or her. You should also be able to stay calm and discuss the problem in peace. When you are discussing with your partner, you should ask related and relevant questions to clarify all doubts and differences.

Good and open communication is a vital factor for developing a healthy and happy relationship. You should discuss all problems, feelings and differences with your partner. Fully trusting your partner and not being jealous of his or her professional and personal progress is very important.

The way to approach your relationship and marriage life should always be positive. Whenever conflicts or problems arises that lead to bitterness, always reflect back to those happy moments spent together and make effort to revive and reignite those moments back. When there are conflicts or problems, don't get so disturbed or panic, always stay calm and be yourself.

Whenever you find it difficult to control your temperament especially during any argument, generally, you tend to say and do things that you didn't mean to say or do.

Creating long term plans with your partner is another best way to save your marriage. Make plans to spend vacations that can be memorable at good picnic spot. Future plans made together will help to increase marriage intimacy and love. It will give you assurance that your partner will always be there for you when you need him or her.

Your overall personal hygiene is also a great factor on your marriage life. Hence, always try to be presentable the way your partner will admire and cherished you. And also adopt hygienic habits. With these, saving a collapsing marriage should never be a difficult or problematic issue to deal with any more.

Try some of the above possible approaches and change your married life to a happy, pleasant and hassle-free one.

RECOMMENDED LINKS:
How to Forgive Your Partner

Save Your Marriage Brushed Nickel Plug-In Wall Light

Save Your Marriage Wall Sconce in Brushed Nickel

The "Save-Your-Marriage" Easy Tree Stand

Top 10 Marriage Mistakes.

Mistake No. 1: Lack of Respect.
Never say anything bad about your partner to your friends or associates. Spouses always need to be thanked. They need to know that they are appreciated.

Mistake No. 2: Not Listening to Your Spouse.This include allowing your spouse to wander, paying more attention to the computer or television set ignoring body language and interrupting.

Mistake No. 3: Lack of Sexual Intimacy.This is a death knell for a marriage. Seek medical and therapeutic counselling if necessary. Don’t leave your spouse wondering why you aren’t interested in sex.

Mistake No. 4: Always Having to Be Right.This include lecturing your mate or having to have the last word. Very few people can love a know-it-all forever. Admit when you don’t have all the answers. Don’t answer every simple question with a long-winded dissertation on the topic.

Mistake No. 5: Not Walking the Talk.Action they say speaks louder than words. When you say you will do something, do it. And when you say you will not do something, follow through.

Mistake No. 6: Hurtful Teasing.If your spouse says the teasing is hurtful, then stop it. Claiming that your spouse doesn’t have sense of humour or is too sensitive is being inconsiderate and unkind.

Mistake No. 7: Dishonesty.Telling lies and keeping secrets in your relationship can create distance and lack of trust between the two of you.

Mistake No. 8: Being Annoying.This includes continuing to have gross personal hygiene habits, or always being late or nitpicking everything your spouse does, e.t.c. It is when you know you are annoying and you continue to annoy.

Mistake No. 9: Being Selfish and Greedy.This is when your money is for you alone and you spend so much on yourself, but your spouse spends a dime, it then becomes a big deal. This is not wanting to open your home to your friends and family because you prefer to be alone and don’t want the hassles of entertaining. This is hogging the remote, only going to cheap restaurants when you could afford better or not watching movies your spouse wants to watch.

Mistake No. 10: Temper Tantrums.
Every couple needs to be able to handle conflicts in a constructive way. Having an angry outburst so that you can win an argument will make you the loser in the end.

RECOMMENDED LINKS:
The Top 10 Break Up Mistakes:How to Get Your Ex Lover Back Even After Making Every Mistake In The Book

7 Critical Mistakes People Commonly Make in Intimate Relationships...and How to Avoid Them

Marriage by Mistake

Nine Critical Mistakes Most Couples Make: Identify the Pitfalls and Discover God's Help

Chetan Bhagat Combo Of 4 Books : Five Point Someone, One Night at the Call Centre, 2 States (The Story of My Marriage) and The 3 Mistakes of My Life

Thinking VS Acting.

Cliches are a dime a dozen, but there are two that are appropriate when it comes to relationships and romance. Those two comments are “It’s the thought that counts” and “Actions speak louder than words.” These two concepts are unique in that they are both true when it comes to any relationship and they also much be somehow balanced in order to work properly. Each action or thought truly depends on the two individuals that are involved as well as the particular situation they find themselves in. On one hand, the gesture or the gift that makes an impact while on the other hand, it’s the thought or the meaning or the intention that makes an impact.

Along with the thought and action, there are many other layers involved in what makes any romantic effort in a relationship work or not work. First, it is important to stop stereotyping each other, trying to make assumptions about what he or she thinks, feeling threatened by their position at work, intellectually or otherwise, ignoring feelings and so on. Secondly, it is important to be yourself and accept your partner for who he or she is.  Communicate with each other while really listening. Always practice good manner with each other even though you may be comfortable enough to pass wind in front of each other. There is no need to let it all go. Make your relationship your first priority over everything else in your life.

Stop making jokes about male or female behavior or conditions. While it may be funny for the moment, it can become part of how we view each other or how we fear our partner's view us. Don't assume anything that you aren't one hundred percent sure about when it comes to your spouse. He or she will most likely prove you wrong. Don't act as of every action was a huge sacrifice- martyrs can suck a relationship dry. Offer each other trust, hope, the benefit of the doubt and trying to understand how he or she feels before assuming any position.

Sometimes it's best to begin slowly and build up to the more complicated aspects of growing a relationship with anyone. All it takes is one successful step in the right direction and you and your spouse will be hungry for more. Cuddle up together without the television on, the radio on, turn the phones off and if you have kids, put them to bed early. Take him or her to a special tree and carve your initials in together. 

Take the time to do something you normally wouldn't do that he or she is sure to enjoy. Men love to have their feet massaged and most women don't know that! Sit him or her down in a chair, place their feet in a hot bin of water, wash and massage their feet, dry them off and go about your day as you normally would!

Try to find a way to provide your love with something he or she can live without but truly enjoys. Does he or she love a white Christmas but you live in an area where snow doesn't fall or the weather isn't cooperating? Find a way to fill your lawn with snow or artificial snow so that you are the one giving them a white Christmas.

Ways to Save A Marriage.

To maintain happy and healthy marriage is very important to both the two individuals involve as it directly touches their personal lives. The main reason for marriage is to assist, support and encourage one another through happiness and sadness. Few years after marriage, crisis might find its way into the family leading to misunderstandings and bitterness and also regrets among the couples. This usually make marriage relationship become stressful and discouraging.

It will then become difficult for the couples to live together which will make them to start thinking of separation as an option. Before deciding the final step to take, the couples should find ways of saving their marriage as it is boring and hard to live alone.

When you realized that your marriage is in danger, start looking for options to salvage your marriage. The first thing couples need to do is to discuss in order to find out and understand the real cause of the problem. The best way to solve conflicts in marriage is through dialogue and mutual understanding. Couples should express intense passion and love for one another. If you succeeded in developing love and passion for one another, solving all other problems may be immediate.

If that did not work and the crisis still continues, there are other options that need to be tried. Some couples resort to meet their family members, friends or religious leaders for advices. But, couples should always ponder over the advices that will be given to them. Whether the advices are good enough or not as bad advices that can cause more harm to the relationship.

Many couples resort to participate in marital counselling which might be among the effective methods to saving marriages. In such situations, both partners should try to attend the counselling sessions which might be the effective tool to enhance their relationship. The couples should sincerely and openly discuss their marriage problems in order to get the right solution. Marriage counselling can help couples to improve and enhance their communication skills.

This may really help to open up some other problems and issues, and also find out some differences and at the same time understand the difficulties of couples. It offers a better opportunity for couples to discuss their feelings and also helps to clear their misunderstanding. Many couples were successful to resolve their marriage crisis after taking part in marriage seminars or couples retreats.

With these options, few couples choose a marriage separation as a trial. It might be one among the helpful methods to salvage the dwindling marriage as it offers an important opportunity to both partners to have a taste of being separated from one another before deciding the final step to take. The main advantage of trial marriage separation is that, it can be reversed.

The major reason of trial marriage separation is to develop skills and knowledge of resolving problems before coming back together and work on improving the relationship.

Any of these methods may be applied to save your crumbling marriage from collapsing and make your marriage life a paradise on earth once again with your cherished partner.

Ways to Save Your Marriage.

Marriage is one of the happiest and memorable moments in our lives. It is a union of not only two individuals, but also of two different upbringings and cultures. After a cheerful start of married life, there might be a possibility or beginning of some conflicts. These may be due to some misunderstandings, ego or other personal problems. Sometimes the bitterness in the relation crosses the tolerance level that the couples think of getting separated.

However, a divorce affects the personal and social lives of both the partners. You will be surprised to know that your marriage problems can be resolved.

Here are 5 ways to save a marriage that can be effectively implemented in your married life. 

The first step to resolve the marriage problems is to agree that they exist. You should be honest with yourself, should be able to identify the differences in your relationships and try to improve them. If your try to go away from the issues, they will never be solved. Accept the situation as it is and be prepared for the challenges which may lie ahead.

It is said that you cannot fight the enemy that you cannot see. This philosophy is absolutely true in case of marriages. If you feel that your husband has changed the way of interaction, then find out the reasons behind it. The best solution is to start the conversation with your spouse and give him several opportunities to 'open up'. Keep your ears and mind open for the subtle hints from his conversation. 

Saving your marriage is not merely solving the problems. Reigniting your love for each other is one of the effective 5 ways to save a marriage. You can express your passion for your partner with special dates or surprises. Remember the most romantic times you spent together and recreate them with an addition of a unique approach.

Give some time for each other to share the feelings. The purpose is to grab the attention of your partner and make your relationships healthy with natural attraction. If you are successful in developing the passion for each other, then other problems can be immediately solved.

There may be many obstacles when you are trying to fix the relationships. It might be difficult for you to communicate with your husband or you may be facing outside pressures from the family which may prevent you to focus on your goals. Even after facing these barriers, you should be persistent on your aims. If one approach fails, you can try another approach that may work. You should be able to handle the conflicts safely.

One of the important steps among 5 ways to save a marriage is to seek the right advice from your friends and family. You should try to get an expert advice from counselling sessions or books before you take any major decision. A wise advice can save your marriage, while bad advice may ruin it.

Knowing about 5 ways to save a marriage, you would be able to resolve the problems if any in your marriage and live a happy married life.

Why Do Men Cheat On Their Partners?

Are you a woman who suspects that your man is cheating on you? If you do, you may be interested in catching them in the act. But, first, you may have a number of questions. One of the most common questions asked by women who have been cheated on is “why do men cheat?”

When it comes to determining why men cheat on their wives or their girlfriends, it is difficult to come up with an exact reason. Why? Because men cheat for a wide range of different reasons. For example, your boyfriend may cheat for one reason, but one another man may be cheating for a whole other reason.

Despite the fact that it is difficult to determine exactly why men cheat, namely your man, there are a number of common reasons. These reasons, a few of which are highlighted below, may be the cause of your cheating husband or boyfriend.

1. To Get Out of a Relationship: What do you do when you decide that you went to end a relationship? If you are like many other women, you breakup with your boyfriend or ask for a divorce from your husband. For some men, this is a lot easier said than done. Those who fear breakups, often opt for cheating instead. These men often wish to get caught, as most women will not put up with a cheating partner.

What does this mean? It means that some men use cheating as an easy way to get out of a relationship. Unfortunately, most men don't take the pain of a broken heart into consideration.

2. Unfulfilled Desires: Unfulfilled desires is another common reason why some men cheat. In these instances, men do not want to end their relationship with their girlfriend or wife. In fact, they may truly love their significant other, it's just that their desires aren't being fulfilled. All individuals, including both men and women, have sexual desires. If those desires aren't being met at home, a man may turn elsewhere. Aside from the sexual standpoint and the act of cheating, these types of men often have otherwise healthy relationships at home.
   

3. An Improvement in Self-Confidence: There comes a point in every woman's life when she looks in the mirror and thinks “what has happened to me?” Men go through this same experience. Whether it be increasing in age, a change in physical appearance, or a generalized decrease in self-confidence, many men are afraid of what they see or what they have become. These men often need an uplifting experience. Unfortunately, not all men opt for something adventurous like skydiving or rock-climbing. Many other men decide to have an affair.
   

4. Convenience: Unfortunately, many wives and girlfriends make the mistake of assuming that affairs are long-term term and last for weeks, months or years. In fact, a large percentage of men who cheat only have what is commonly referred to as one night stands. This is when they have sexual relations with another woman and return home to you, possibly never seeing that woman again. As for why men have one night stands, many do so because it is convenient and because they can. Also, in these types of situations, alcohol is typically a factor.
   

5. Just Because: It is important to remember that a man doesn't have to have a reason to cheat. There are some men who honestly don't care about who they hurt in the process. There are other men who simply just make a mistake. If you think that your man is cheating on you, it may be more important to focus on what you should do, as opposed to dwelling on why he decided to cheat in the first place.

As highlighted above, there are a number of common reasons why men cheat. With that said, it is important to remember that men are not the only ones who cheat. Some women are just as bad. Don't let yourself become one of those women, especially if your only goal is to seek revenge.

Is Your Marriage a Companionship or a Love Affair?

Every marriage is just like any relationship. They have their ups and downs, agreements and disagreements and good days and bad days. When you put two people from different backgrounds with different ideas, feelings and expectations together, you simply can't expect everything to be wonderful all of the time! While some marriages have very serious problems that can only be solved by intense focus and even therapy, most marriages simply become "stale" or uninteresting.

It is important to reflect on exactly what is causing any conflict or uneasiness in a marriage before acting on it. In a great many marriages, the excitement and 'take my breath away' feelings are fading or they are even gone. It doesn't mean that the love is gone.  Love sometimes needs a little stimulation in order to revisit and maintain the feelings we all crave and yearn for. That stimulation is called "romance".

Many people mistake a marriage that seems to be ordinary or unexceptional as lacking love. It simply isn't the case!  Most marriages do not lack love, but they do lack romance! Love is easy and peaceful, while romance is what makes a relationship hot and arousing. 

Every single person on earth in any type of relationship desires passion and romance in his or her life. Unfortunately, there are a few things about romance most people don't understand. The most common problem in creating romance in a relationship is that people simply don't know how to do it! Other times, people are fixed in cultural classifications and their partners are unable to appreciate them for their own special and unique qualities.  Ultimately, some people have simply given up on their search for romance.

In a time where everything is convenient and available almost at the touch of a button, the effort of romance seems as if it takes a good deal of effort. It is very possible to take some old-fashioned romantic ideas and make them work in a modern world while maintaining the genuine intention behind each thought and act.  Romance today can be filled with unique ideas, creativity and passion. Romance is simply the way you express your love for another person. It is vital to keeping love fresh, exciting and alive. Without romance, love can become tiresome and even worse.

The expression of love through romance keeps it alive, fun and worthwhile. Romance is only true, though, when carried out with no ulterior motives. The only reason romance should be initiated is in an attempt to show love and appreciation. Romance with true intentions is when you want to show your mate that you are thinking about them and they matter enough to make the effort to bring your love to life through action.

Romance is more like an artistic creation as opposed to an exact science. Those who tend to feel competitive in almost everything they do will need to check that attitude at the door when initiating romance. Love and romance should not be considered a contest that should be outdone time and again. It should be considered a cooperative activity. While love and romance take two in order to work, you can be extremely romantic while still keeping your individuality. Love and romance make perfect partners and can make you and your partner perfect companions as well!